


Again

by BroodySunshine



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-22
Updated: 2014-09-22
Packaged: 2018-02-18 09:22:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2343356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BroodySunshine/pseuds/BroodySunshine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam heads to NYADA to tell Blaine how he feels. Blaine is playing a love song for ... who?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Again

Again

(Sam’s POV)  
I walk through the empty halls of NYADA looking for one person. Blaine. It’s late in the day and there are very few students around. I called Rachel when I couldn’t find him at his apartment earlier and she informed me he has been working in the school hall a lot lately on some assignment pieces. This was not an unusual thing as he was always booking hall time to play the grand piano as the acoustics were so much better than his piano in the apartment. Or at least that is what Blaine always said. I think he sounds great on my little sister’s My First Keyboard.

I couldn’t wait for him to get home tonight though. I had come back to New York to tell him that yes I have figured out what I want from life. I want him. Of course, now I know that it has been him for quite some time. It took me awhile, but I have never been the quickest at figuring things out. 

I have always known that I was bi or pan or whatever label you want to put on things, because I don’t fall for any type of person, I fall for their soul. I see things in people that make me want to take care of them. This has not been in my favour historically. Unfortunately, I usually find myself the in-between guy. I couldn’t handle it if I was that for Blaine, so I think that is why I have left it so long to actually tell him how I feel.   
It has been over 6 months now since he and Kurt had the long-awaited “It really is over” conversation and are now just good friends. If Kurt opens his eyes and decides he does want him back, he is going to have a fight on his hands. Not a real fight, because I don’t want to hit him. We would have to have a diva-off or something. Not that I would have a chance in the singing department against Kurt, but given the stakes, I would give it my all in any case. Hey, My All by Mariah Carey might be a good choice. Wait, I am getting all negative.

“Keep on track Evans,” I say quietly to myself “You can do this! The time is right”. I am not chickening out of telling him …again.  
I get butterflies in my stomach at the thought of seeing him. We talk every day on the phone, but that pales in comparison to actually spending time with the man. Blaine makes me feel excited and grounded at the same time. He makes my heart stop and beat faster all at once. Sounds confusing I know. Believe me, having these feelings for years and afraid of losing my best friend, is the best and the worst feeling all at once.

I must be heading in the right direction as I can hear the tinkering of the piano keys. He has a certain sound that only Blaine can make. Or I may be biased, I don’t know. I eventually get to the door and find him. Gosh he is beautiful. He hasn’t seen me as he is facing the back corner. He’s wearing a hoodie which is not really like him, it looks a bit big. I think it may be mine. I don’t remember how long since I saw it last. I must have left it in New York on one of my recent visits. 

He starts to sing and I can’t help but smile. His talent amazes me every time I hear him. I recognise the music from one of my mum’s Janet Jackson CDs. I believe it is called “Again”.

I heard from a friend today  
And she said you were in town  
Suddenly the memories  
Came back to me in my mind  
How can I be strong, I've asked myself  
Time and time I've said  
That I'll never fall in love with you again

The pain in his voice makes my face fall and then I listen to the lyrics. Who is he singing about? Does he miss Kurt? Have I missed my chance? Yet again! I drop to a nearby chair and feel my world start to fall apart, or at least my tear ducts. 

A wounded heart you gave  
My soul you took away  
Good intentions you had many  
I know you did  
I come from a place that hurts  
And God knows how I've cried  
And I never want to return  
Never fall again  
Making love to you  
Would have felt so good and  
Oh so right  
How can I be strong I've asked myself  
Time and time I've said  
That I'll never fall in love with you again

Wait, the lyrics are a bit different. Did he say “would have”?

So wish we were alone again  
Didn't think it'd come to this  
And to know I won’t have you  
Not even a little kiss  
I won’t risk our happiness   
And have you swept away  
Don't think I can take the pain  
Never fall again

My heart skips a beat when I hear that his love is unrequited. Could it be me? He hasn’t mentioned anyone else in the many times we have talked over the last months? His voice is getting a little scratchy and I can tell he is starting to cry.

Kinda late in the game  
And my heart is in your hands  
Don't you stand there and then tell me  
You love me then leave again  
'Cause I’ve fallen in love with you, Sam

Wait, did he just say … ?

Hold me, hold me  
Don't ever let me go  
Say it just one time  
Say you love me  
God knows I do love you…Sam*

As my heart stops and races at the same time (told you it was confusing), I sit and stare in disbelief as the love of my life leans onto the piano with his elbows, making an awful clunking sound. He buries his face in his hands and his shoulders shake with sobs.

Talk Sam!

“Do you mean that?” I ask in hope.

He nearly falls of the stool as he whips the top half of his body around to where the sound of my strangled voice comes from.

“Sam?”

“Do you mean it?” I repeat “Do you really love me?”

“I, I…” he blusters and looks to the floor.

Oh no, he thinks I’m mad. I get up from the chair near the entrance to the hall and approach him slowly.

“Please, tell me for real. Is this how you feel? It’s not just an assignment piece?”

Blaine just stares at me with those big puppy dog eyes. There are still tears falling down his beautiful face and I want nothing more than to be able to kiss them away, but I need to say this right. I kneel down in front of him and put my hands on his thighs to steady myself and, if I’m honest, because I need the physical contact with him.

“Blaine, I..”

“Sam, it’s ok.” Blaine blurts out, his face flushing. “You don’t have to say anything. You’ve been so good at putting up with me and my feelings for you. I-I’m fine, I will –“

I grab his face and kiss him. A little harder than what I wanted our first real kiss to be like, but I needed him to stop talking. He freezes at first and his eye snap wide open, but after what feels like an eternity, he melts and kisses me back. When I feel his hands come up around my shoulders I soften the kiss slightly. Only when air becomes necessary, do we break apart and lean our foreheads together, panting.

“Blaine,” I say. “I love you. We have had more than just a bromance for a while now and I want you to know that it’s not just you that is having these feelings. I don’t breathe properly of a morning until I talk to you. I don’t sleep at night until I have heard about your day. I think about you constantly and have made so many macaroni pictures of you, I could fill an entire gallery.”

Blaine smiles that beautiful, big smile of his and more tears flow from his eyes. I kiss each cheek, trying to make him feel just how much I care about him and want him to tell me I’m not a corny dork for saying all the things I have been wanting to tell him.

“Sam, please don’t wake me up. I am having the best dream right now.” Blaine cups my cheeks and stares into my eyes and I fall in love with him all over again.

“Do you want me to sing Wake me up before you go go?” I ask with a slight smile, both of us, remembering our Guilty Pleasures duet.

He stares into my eyes and whispers, “Are you sure about this Sam? I don’t think I could handle it if we didn’t work out. I need you in my life and if that means just being your best friend –“

“I have never been so sure of anything in my life” I tell him truthfully. “I am more than aware of how you make me feel emotionally and we have both felt the physical effects we have on each other” I give him a wry grin. Many nights we have fallen asleep watching movies over the years, to wake up completely wrapped around each other and the sudden need to change lower body positions (or take cold showers).

“I love you, Sam” Blaine smiles at me, and I feel my face split in two with my smile and my whole body feels like it has just come to life after being asleep for an eternity. “I love you, I love you, I love you” He repeats, raining kisses all over my face and tightening his arms around my neck.

The tingles in my body have become full-on fireworks and I just can’t seem to control my face which has never smiled this big before. And for my mouth, that is something.

I tighten my arms around his small frame and bury my head into his neck. I breathe him in. I have always loved how he smelt.

“Is this my hoodie?” I ask him, not letting go to look at his face though as my arms are still holding him tight.

“Um, maybe” He mumbles, with that cute, shy voice he gets when he’s been caught out. “It was my Sam-hug when the real thing wasn’t here” It’s a soft whisper that I barely hear, but I give him a long, loving kiss on the cheek

“Well, I’m not going anywhere” I whisper.

“I’m still keeping the hoodie” He whispers and I feel his cheeky smile in my neck.

I tickle him and grab his face while he’s laughing and can’t help but go in for another long kiss. Just the start of what I am sure will be a lifetime of loving kisses.

 

* AGAIN – PERFORMED BY JANET JACKSON. LYRICS BY BHATTACHARYA, SAMEER / CULPEPPER, JAMES / HARTMANN, JARED / SEALS, KIRKPATRICK / STURM, LACEY NICOLE / LEWIS, MARK T – With some re-writes by Broody Sunshine :)


End file.
